how a weekend with suzanne sterling changed my life ~ maureen convery

I learned about Suzanne Sterling in a class that included her song Om Mane Padme Hum. This song carried me through some tough times in the years that followed. When I learned she was coming to Yoga Home for a weekend, I jumped at the opportunity to work the event and take the classes.

As the weekend drew closer I decided to read the description. This was when the panic set in. The weekend was titled “Sing Your Soul Awake”. Reading the description, I learned that in addition to yoga we would be singing and dancing. I envisioned myself in a room full of talented yogis with radiant voices, flowing with graceful dance moves. Meanwhile, I’d be singing off key and dancing badly, probably tripping over mats and water bottles. I did the only thing I could think of: I called the studio and tried to get out of the commitment.

Fortunately, it was too late, and I found myself immersed in a weekend that, while challenging to me, transformed my life. While I am still a second rate singer and uncoordinated dancer, I have learned to embrace my voice and my movement in a way that makes each day a bit brighter and easier than it would otherwise be.

Suzanne taught us that the value of our voice lies not in the perfection of the sound; rather the beauty of our voice lies in our intent. As humans we are surrounded by sound in the womb, and we enter the world with our only tool – our voice. Many learned that their voice was meant to be heard, but I was taught that silence is golden. Throughout the weekend, as we focused on our voice and movement, I began chipping away at the shame I’d associated with my voice and body.

The transformation started slowly. First I made the commitment to sing and dance every single day (much to the chagrin of my teenage son!). As months of singing and dancing went by, I began to realize that song and dance bring me joy. When I start my morning experiencing joy, I send joy into the world. It is a beautiful, unending cycle that now surrounds me, guiding my thoughts and actions.

The lessons did not stop there. As I sang and danced my way through my days, I found my voice taking on a life of its own. Suddenly I found myself saying things I never would have said before. Things like “I don’t like that you just did that”, a thought I often had yet rarely expressed. As the weeks and months wore on, as singing and dancing became who I am, I found that I was less afraid to be who I am in all walks of my life. To say that I’d finally found my voice underestimates the transformation I’ve experienced. I suppose that spending so much of my time engaging in something I’m not particularly good at but really enjoy, led me to realization that there is a direct relationship between my voice and the joy I feel. If something happens now that upsets me, or scares me, or just really bugs me, chances are I’ll speak up about it. This is not always received well, but using my voice in this way does remind me that I am Here, I am Valuable, I am Worthy – even when I’m off –tune, spastic in my moves, or expressing a thought others don’t want to hear.

I’m registered to go to her next workshop, and again, I’m anxious, but also excited. I am certain that I, and many others, need to create a way to move through these challenging times we are facing, without losing our humanity. We can learn that from Suzanne.

My anxiety stems from her statement that Ritual asks us to become our own spiritual authority. Quite frankly, this scares the heck out of me. I wonder who I will be if I am my own spiritual authority? If I am fully aware of all that I am, and can be in our collective universe, our collective experience, what will that look like? More importantly, am I up to the task? Am I ready to take off the yogic training wheels I currently rely on and fully embrace and live the lessons our teachers guide us through every time we practice? There is only one way to find out!

I am approaching this weekend with trepidation, excitement, and resolution: I have resolved that I will embrace the teachings Suzanne has to offer, and I will take them off my mat, into my home, into my soul. I’m not sure what that will look like, but I am sure I will be stronger, happier and more capable as I embrace all that Suzanne has to offer.

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Join us for a weekend with Suzanne Sterling – November 10-11th for The Art of Ritual

written by Team Lead, Maureen Convery